<< RELIEVED >>

After all confusions,anger,sorrows,pain and hatred...

Finally im relieved now....

Evrythg is OVER.

Happened just yesterday.

I GAVE in,despite was deeply hurt. Reason being is because i do love him,i do love our rltnshp and i simply just love US.

Yes,i felt kinda big loss to let go of tis particular thing, but its not as bearable to lose him.

So, i rather let go of this particular thingy than to let go of him.

Decided to meet him up.

He waited for me at the MRT station.

I saw hes reddy eyes. Not sure wats the cause but he looked like he just cried.
*not sure*

My assumtion at that point of time was that hes still gonna show me hes stuck up face.

But i was wrong.

As we walked, getting near to each other, he jus pulled me close to him and hugged me tite, right in the middle of the MRT station, even before i could pull out my hand to salam him.

I was squeeeezed tightly to his body which made me to leave my lipgloss mark stained onto hes white uniform shirt.

He then gave me a peck on my forehead. My feeling that moment was just soo speechless.

I could only managed to say, " Baba....................mama love u!." He then softly whispered to my ear, "Baba pon love u ma..baba sorry..."

I just felt SO RELIEVED, TOUCHED,LOVED and MISSED.

We then proceed to hes car and had our long talk in the car,whc we always open up n clarify things wif each other.

And he told me about hes outstation project that he had signed bond wif to Bahrain.
I was kinda shocked at first cos initially was told that if hes going off to Bahrain, he have to fly off tis June, meaning we have to differ our wedding date.

Again, i was RELIEVED wen he said that he signed for the bond for 3 years. So we get married here first. Only then, we will migrate to Bahrain for a year or so. Accomodations,car and international school for our future kids, (insyallah if we ald have one), all will be provided by hes company.

Alhamdulillah....mudah2an dimurahkan rezeki di sane...Amin!

After all the talkings, we went for supper at Simpang Bedok and sumhow we were back as the normal us.

Im so glad.. =)

All credits to my dearie sistas, Kak CT, Sis Hanida, Sis Yanti, Sis Suana Nini and Nirah. Thk u all for all ur advices, concern, moral support and encouragements to make me stay strong.

Luv ya all!! But mostly i love my BABA SHAFIE!!!

Ive never ever regret of having u to be my LIFE-PARTNER ba..Insyallah.

Never will i wanna lose u syg...Never! Syg u loadz Baba!

How long will it last...? =(

I just dunno how long will it last...

I cant stand tis feeling..infact i really hate tis feeling...

Y does tis feeling keeps on repeating over n over again??

Its been umpteen times i burst out into tears here..at my desk @ work..

Tis place have lots of evidence of my happiness,sorrows,pain and misery...

I believe all these are the challenges and hurdles that HE gave us during engagement..

But,y do ppl jus wanna take an easy way out???

If i can take up wif ur nonsense, y cldnt u?? And now ure turning the table back on me..

Tis is just soo UNFAIR!

I tried my best to hold back my tears..

But the msg he jus sent to me really made me cant take it but to jus let it out...

Yes,im crying rite now as i type tis post!! -DAMN IT!-

I just cant believe that he would say that to me!!

Again,it reminds me of "him"..

Bottom line, " ARE ALL GUYS THE SAME?"

Haiz! My body n hand suddenly turned cold...Jus afraid of the outcomes that gonna happen soon...

Really have no idea on wats gonna happen next..

PRAYING HARD is the only thing that i could do now...


*badly hurt n still holding back tears*

WADDHELL!!

Waddahell waddahell waddahell!!!

Just wat is soooo wrong wif these kind of human huh? To be specific, these kind of women! Are they HEARTLESS?? Dun they have any FEELINGS?

Please do behave and watch ur words wen speaking to sumone's fiance! Im not being soo petty here but wat would u guys feel n tink to the extend this ppl msg this to ur partner, " Please do tell me if ure available again!" despite noeing that we're getting married..

Wat would u guys do?? Hmm...i noe n i tend to tink positively that he is not gonna do anythg bad behind me cos i tink hes courtesy n honest enuff to fwrd tis msg to me. So the prob lies wif the girlsfriends..

I dun wish to stop him from befriending wif hes frends cos i tink i still dun hav the full priorities or infact the full power to stop him from contacting wif them, unless if im officially hes WIFE. And im trying to be as understanding fiance/partner but sumtimes the hurt that i felt is jus so speechless!

GOD, please gimme the strength to stay strong n move on wif our beautiful life. Cos i understand that these are the challenges and hurdles that we're prone to go thru during engagement life.


*heartpain*

"CHEAP" - Thats wat i got from him.

Million of thanks to him. If HE thinks they are BETTA than me, i'll just leave it to HIM. I rest my case. It always like tis. - "1 mistake u made out of 10 good deeds, people will just and always see u as a BAD person and even will think so LOWLY of u..to the extent CHEAP!"

They may spout it out out of anger but wait, have ever heard "THINK BEFORE U SAY ANYTHING" ?? So think again.....Dun use ur anger as an EXCUSE to say WATEVA u want and at the end of the day,u REGRET cos things mite not be the SAME again due to the "UNINTENTIONAL" words that u said.

So, we'll jus see how long this thing gonna be like this. To me, its such and UNFAIR game! Or issit its just me hus STUPID enuff to jus let bygones be bygones and to just GIVE in to him for the sake of our BOND we ald had build up tgthr despite the mistake he made, while he make a BIG FUSS out of the mistake that i made?


Dun u tink its all like turning around back to me? Haiz...whatever it is, tis time round im not gonna jus FORGIVE and FORGET for the word they had given me. Not gonna let another DISASTER to happen in my LIFE again.


Lemme ask u, ARE ALL THE GUYS' MINDSET THE SAME?? DO THEY TEND TO DO/SAY THE SAME THINGS TO THEIR PARTNER EACH TIME THEY FIND FAULTS IN US??
Haiz...im so SORRY but the TRUST i have for GUYS just SUNK deeply down...and i really mean DEEP,DEEP DOWN.


-period-


*deeply hurt n just gonna keep silence*

Give up!

Yoohaaaa...!!!

Im back wif my plain empty n borrriiinnnggg blog! hahaha!!! And noe wat??
After weeks of saving my blog entry as draft,trying to share my CNY holidays, i finally cekalkan hati to jus delete that draft cos da tak kuasa to type pjg2 den upload pics, have to adjust sume balek la bla bla bla....ok i noe im really such a LAZY n BORRING blogger! hahahaha!!
i tink i jus skip that sharing maring post.. but if u nak tau jgk, just like si Physco bitch tu...u can view my cuz, Nirah's blog for those CNY holiday moments..(dats if korang kuasa la..kalau tak,buat bodoh sua..hehe!) cos most of the time during CNY holiday we spent time "bitching" tgthr ..so yeah.. *wink at nirah*

Well,now lemme jus update wat happened recently...

Hmm...firstly, me n shafie da consperm taking the Lephotographer as our photographer on Sat only n hes day on Sun will be Cik Zain,e one mama strongly recommended to me..yeah!!!! This is wat u called, COMPROMISE! =) (Anw,have mentioned abt tis in my last post?? Urgghh..slenge nye aku! *wateva la, lebih afdal..hehe!* hehe!!

Then on thurs, i was soo tied up at work..i tink 3 or 4 time i went to the toilet to make my dreamland bisnes..haha!! Nantok gile la seh! Hahahaha! So wen i got home, i mkn sikit den tros baaaap...TIDO!!! n wanna noe wat time i woke u?? i slep from 615pm n woke up at 6 am the next morning!!! Tk ke best tuuu...?? And lg best is..NO DISTURBANCE by anyone at all ok! haha!!! Tapi kesian laki aku kene layan diri sendri..hehe! Sory baba!


Then errmm....ouh ya! My new room furniture da dtg..n my room da mcm org baru pinda siotz! dgn baju2 sume mcm mintak kene bakar siol!! punye la belambak!!!! haha! haiz...bleh menangis aku nk susun sume to transfer from the old wardrobe to the new one.. *cry sambil campak2 baju dlm wardrobe* Adoooiiii...seribu tahun la nampak nye nk kemas tu sume..haha!!

Next,went to my Aunt's grandchild's bird-day kepang..eh salah..bird-day party..on the 8th (Sat)hehe! But frankly,the whole party was like juz acara kuda kepang je la seh!! Cos my aunt buat besar2an for jus that 3 ke 4 yr old boy tu.. *Sory An, i forgotten wats ur age..hehe!* All attention are on the kuda tempang n not that poor lil' boy..Shiaaan die.. kuda tempang kemane, bird-day boy pon kemane....And yes i agree that its for entertainment but dun u tink its a waste of time?? And to me its very the tak masok akal to joinn all these kuda2 kepang cos entertainment punye pasal,drg hav to menyerupai as kuda la, smp kene sampok2 la,pengsan2 la...kan menyusahkan org n bodohkan diri sendri.. so yar,dats my point of view la..kalau terkene ngan sape2 yg in kuda kepang nye group, WOOOPPZZZ! Too bad.... *run away*

Next, abt the selection pics for our makeover shots.. its such a bluddy crappie policy sia!!! Tipah tertipu bang,,tipah tertipu!!! Voucher for makeover is $180 for makeup n hairdo. But! We as in the 2 Munirah..(my cuzz n my gf,) n mama, have to pay for the outfit that we gonna wear,but that doesnt really matters la cos the ones that we paid,it will be ours jgk la.. besides that, the pics nye paymen sume mcm wallaueh! Punye la mrepek! The thgs that consist in the voucher are: -

1) fake eyelashes for $12.90 (compulsory!)
2) unlimited photo shots..but we get ONLY 2 PATHETIC PIECE of 4R pics..waddahell!
(additional pics is like $5 per pic!)
3) $36 for jus the blank empty CD if we wanna hav those ADDITIONAL pics to be in. SO its like we pay for the additional pics that we paid $5/pcs and those are the only ones that will be in that stupid CD. Isnt dat crap??

Really eating up our money sia!! Kalau gitu,lebeh baik jgn kate VOUCHER for FREE makeup n hairdo!! Dengs nye jinapret betol! Boss drg pon very the not professional! + PERASAN! Marah staff in front of us, the customers, den perasan kite tgk kan die plak..heesh! Kalau da nyah, nyah jgk la..slalu perasan! ahakz!

Seriously not a second time place to go...wanna noe the name??? Tkpe la..biar la rahsia but its located near Zam Zam at North Bridge Rd..

Bottom line is, we jus got CONNED!!! *nabey!* woopz! kan da tercabul mulut gue! Ya ampuuuunnn!! hehe!

Lastly,bout me n my tunz...hmm...hav been soo much in love and also been in high n low tide of our love journey tghtr! But at times mmg la due2 mcm kuch n anj sikit..haha!! Due2 ngade2 nak mampui!! Kite mcm challenge sape bleh sakitkan hati paling dashat! haha! But bile da baik..due2 mcm bunga..haha!!! tapi ape2 pon..rambot kerinting jangan digunting..hehe! Ade pahaaam..? Tak pahaaam?? Gue pon tak pahaaam..hehehe! *ok lame Ika..lame!!*

k la, actuallly tday im not in soo gd mood dats y saje2 je nk past time and luahkan perasaan ku sikit2 pat sini. So k la..till then, lets wait for my very next yearsssssss of updated post k! hehe!

Chao chin chao! Lalalalalalala....!!

Aik,mcm familiar gitukan bunyinye..hahaha !! Siape yg tk kenal kalau si kepo kental yg suke ckp gitu..haha!Terase kape ketak?????? haha! U noe i noe je la eh, High Class PHYSCOBITCH!! kwang kwang kwang...*booo hoo hoo...* =p

K la..taadaaaaa!! =))